Rhetoric counts.

I guess if you can advance an idea that sounds really good, people will keep buying it, even after it is proven wrong. To me, that seems to be the case with communism. Karl Marx suggested a world where everyone produced and everyone equally shared, so there was no more poverty... everyone lived in comfort and security.


That idea has been tested over and over and has always failed. In those few places where it persists, Cuba and North Korea, for example, poverty is the worst in the world. Never mind the corrupt leaders that always emerge, communism as an economic system just won't work. Not with humans, anyway. Inevitably the lazy say, "Why work? I'll still get my share." While the true workers say "Why work? No matter how hard I try, others refuse to work and my share is always diminished." Then the system collapses - unless, of course, those corrupt leaders build an Army to force people to keep grinding away in poverty. (Ala Kim Jung il and Fidel Castro)


On the other hand, capitalism and the free market have succeeded everywhere they are allowed to flourish. Compare the two Koreas. Take a look at tiny Japan. The system is very simple. Work hard, be thrifty and you can improve your own life. Be lazy and wasteful, and your life will not improve.


Yet, many people persist in promoting the Marx "feel good" idea while rejecting the proven success of capitalism.


Following the recent protests against the G-20 meeting in Pittsburgh, Fox News Channel's Sean Hannity interviewed a couple of the protesters. Both bright young, well educated women. One asked "Why would anyone need to earn more than 500 thousand dollars a year?" Hannity didn't really know how to answer them, so I will. It doesn't matter if a person needs to earn that much money. The need is on the part of the employer. Obviously the person getting the big pay has a skill, a talent, a certain knowledge that the employer needs badly enough to pay.


And what about the athletes, the actors and musical performers who are paid millions. Do they need that kind of income? Irrelevant. The need is on the part of millions of adoring fans who happily shell out the bucks to see them perform.


Does Bill Gates need to be the richest man in the world? Hardly likely. But he developed a company which produced products needed by millions of people around the world who bought the products.


Has there been fraud in the capitalist/free market system? Yes, but most often in those organizations where the government is involved. Names like Fannie Mae and Franklin Raines come to mind.


In the above mentioned interview, one of the interviewees said her father worked his fingers to the bone and never made more than $10,000 a year. I wanted to ask, "Did he have a color TV and other luxuries of the day?" In other words, did he just consume everything he earned? Did he take advantage of the opportunity to advance a new idea or develop a new skill that could enhance his income potential? My father never made as much as $10,000 a year, but he raised five children through the depression and we never missed a meal, because he managed his earnings carefully, eschewed all luxuries, and used the money instead to develop other ways to better support his family.


But.... hard work and sacrifice don't sound very appealing, so few promote that!

Maybe we need to find a way to describe those virtues that will make the lazy as well as the highly educated say, "Hey, that sounds great!"

It's Time to Serve
the other white meat!

Due to the stupidity of whomever and the ignorance of the public, the new strain of flu, that H1N1 thing being called the "Swine Flu", a large segment of the public assumed that you could catch it from eating pork.

Wow!

So, people in great numbers quit buying pork and pork producers have suffered mightily. How sad!

My wife served pork chops for dinner. So good! So tender! She also made a great salad, and I embellished mine with bacon bits!

For breakfast I had pork sausage! Such great flavor!

Pork is a wonderful, tasty treat. It is not connected to H1N1.

Go ahead. Serve pork!

If your religion forbids eating pork, sin a little. It is a lot less troublesome than adultery!

Arguing With Idiots

Glen Beck has a new book with that title. It is something I have always advised against, so I will read Glen's book to see what he suggests.

You've seen some of the idiots interviewed on the street by the likes of Jay Leno and Sean Hannity. (Glen, himself, had a Fox producer asking questions of students on the campus at Berkley. Idiots, all!) You've encountered the idiots yourself. We - you - have always just dismissed them. But now, we are seeing them taken seriously, deadly seriously, in the highest levels of government. They are no longer being dismissed.

Attorney General Eric Holder is listening intently to the idiots. He says he will prosecute the intelligence people who, oh so criminally, poured water up the noses of people who gleefully murdered thousands of innocent Americans. President Obama said he will not stand in the way of law enforcement people, if they are enforcing the law against those law breakers: the waterboarders, not the waterboarded!

What is next? Will the idiots direct their outrage to those World War II veterans who, it turns out, actually shot at people for the singular reason that they wore the uniform of Japan or Germany and were shooting at them first? If waterboarding is criminal, what should we say about the GIs who used flame throwers to rout Japs out of a machine gun nest on some Pacific island?

Do you think I am crazy? Pay attention to what the idiots are saying and you, like I, will shiver.

What say you, Glen?

As Pogo 'Possum Once Said...

We have found the enemy - and it is us!

You hear rants and raves about the First Amendment... always in some sort of reference to freedom of the press. Actually, the subject is in the Constitution as what almost seems an afterthought. The exact pertinent wording is "Congress shall make no law -- abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press." Pretty simple.

That "right" from the Bill of Rights has been well-preserved so far as Congress is concerned, largely because the press is itself a most powerful lobby. As has been famously said, one should not argue with someone who buys ink by the barrel. Today, "press" often means people who set no type and buy no ink. And one might well advise against arguing with a man who can speak into a radio microphone and be heard by twenty million pairs of ear.

As one time Republican Presidential candidate Wendell L. Willkie once said, "Freedom of the press is the staff of life for any vital democracy." To me, that trumps the ability to win an argument on the strength of numbers alone.

I am okay with defending freedom of the press, because we so desperately need a free press. But what are we to do when the press commits suicide? The true strength of a free press is the ability to spread the truth. Why have millions of Americans picked up their daily newspaper? Why have millions tuned their television or radio to a favored news program? Because they seek the truth. My mother, a sincere but lightly educated person, believed what was written in the newspaper. Really believed it. Somehow, major newspapers missed that. They ceased to understand that it was printed because it was true, and started believing that it was true because it was printed.

When the press, now more commonly known as "News Media" no longer tells the truth, circulation and audience ratings sag. Today, nearly every major newspaper is losing circulation. Every major television news department is watching their audience ratings plummet. They certainly cannot blame the Congress. They may blame their competition... the internet, or whatever is handy. But the real problem is that the readers and the viewers are beginning to doubt the truth in what they read in their newspapers and see on their television.

Readers and viewers have good reason to be doubters. The September 12 anti-big government protests in Washington, D.C. is a textbook illustration. Photos of the crowds sent home by participants clearly show hundreds of thousands of participants, perhaps a million or two, but editors at the major media outlets just cannot put their political bias aside and report that truth.

Will we reach the point where newspapers are no longer printed? Will television broadcasting one day become solely an entertainment and sports medium?

Will our democracy survive without that staff of life that is a free press?

Medical Mistakes???
Shoot the bastards!

The very idea of medical malpractice lawsuits has always mystified me. No... it has angered me.

There's a joke floating around the Internet about a heart surgeon who owned a motorcycle. One day he took his bike into a garage. A mechanic said, "Doc... you and I do the same kind of work. You get into a person's heart and repair a problem. I do the same thing with motorcycles. I get into a bike's heart, it's engine, and repair a problem. Why should you get paid more than I?"
The surgeon replied, "Try doing it with the engine running."

For me, this "more truth than fiction" story perfectly describes the difference between a medical professionals job, and the job of folks like me, who fix things when the "engine" is not running.

Do medical doctors make mistakes? Are they human? Everyone makes mistakes. I have made some whoppers. Once I made a direct response TV commercial for a client in Philadelphia. I will always believe that I did it well. But when we made a tape of the commercial to send to a TV station, someone transposed the figures on the 800 response number that appeared on the commercial. The commercial aired several times on a Philadelphia TV station, but no calls came to our 800 number. In a panic, I called the TV station and asked that someone view the tape and tell me the 800 number they saw. The mistake was discovered. Any viewer who may have responded to our commercial would have called a wrong number... perhaps hearing a message that the number they dialed was "no longer in service."

I paid for that mistake. I was not paid for my work. I had to pay the TV station's charges for airing the commercial, and I lost the client. But I was not sued! Should I have paid the client for the loss of time in getting his advertising campaign underway? Perhaps. Should I have paid one lawyer a big paycheck for dragging me into court and paid another a fee for keeping me out of jail? Well, I didn't have to.

But, if I had been a medical doctor, I well may have had to pay the client tens of thousands of dollars, and paid the lawyers many more thousands.

There are some crazy things accepted as "the way it is done" in America. None are crazier than medical malpractice lawsuits. Do doctors sometimes become careless and negligent? It is possible. But, should the "harmed" patient receive a huge payday, vastly greater than his actual losses? Should all other patients contribute to that big payday and simultaneously make a trial lawyer wealthy? Like it or not, that is what is happening. and we are paying twice because doctors are then forced to practice "defensive medicine".

Okay... maybe defensive medicine is a necessary step in protecting us. But should insurance company profits and obscene legal fees also be piled on?

We all know that the government fails miserably when it comes to running things. Be it the postal service, Social Security, Amtrak, even Cars for Clunkers. The reason they fail is because decisions are made for political reasons: To gain votes. To shift the blame. To make an opponent look bad or make a friend look good, or, as in the case of trial lawyers, to make a payback for earlier support.

Maybe it will take an uprising of the population. Maybe a new, powerful leader will emerge to do the job. But if this government of, by and for the people is to survive, the job of running things must be forever taken out of the hands of politicians.

Don't shoot yourself in NY!

NFL Super Bowl star Plaxico Burress pleads guilty to weapons charge and accepts plea bargain deal to go to prison for two years. That was the way our local newspaper wrote it. In case you've been on a desert island, Burress stuck a loaded handgun in his jogging pants and went to a NY night club. The thing went off, the bullet lodged in his thigh. And he is going to prison.

It is hard to argue with the law. Carrying a gun in a public place in such a way that it accidentally fires is public endangerment, which is, and should be, against the law.

Big mistake, Plaxico. But think of the reason why he did it.

More and more NFL stars are being assaulted by thugs hoping to prove their toughness by beating up someone they consider the very symbol of toughness, NFL football players. Anyone who has ever gone through full military foot-soldier training knows their is a vast difference between being able to stand up to the poundings of professional football play, and being able to survive a no-rules fight with some one interested only in inflicting bodily damage. NFL players are unequaled in the first. Largely inexperienced in the latter.

I remember Army Infantry basic training noncoms trying to explain to we rookies that hand-to- hand combat in war is not a college level wrestling match. Your opponent has one thought in his mind: your death. No rules. No ethics. He will rip your guts out unless you rip his out first.

Playing football has an entirely different mission: stop the forward progress of the ball. Yes, it requires brutally attacking the ball carrier. But when he is stopped, it is "mission accomplished". But the thugs attacking an NFL player in the street want to rip his guts out.

Surely Burress had no desire to shoot anyone, much less himself. But if attacked, he wanted to be able to produce an "equalizer" which would say, "Back off... I can defend myself."

I am a strong advocate of gun rights. I own four guns, all purchased and used for hunting. But I fully appreciate the use of a gun for self defense. Burress' most costly mistake was in not hiring a bodyguard who would have been capable of safely handling a gun and legally licensed to carry one. It was also a mistake to carry a gun and not know how to do it safely.

Therein lies another important lesson to be learned. This year, gun sales have soared. Americans across the country are buying guns because they feel a greater need for more personal security. (I suspect that Plaxico Burress was one of the new gun owners.)

I was in a large sporting goods store recently and witnessed several people wanting to buy 9mm ammunition. The store, they were told, was sold out. That could have been partly caused by government restrictions on manufacture of the ammunition, but was surely acerbated by increased demand.

So, here is the lesson. If you have recently purchased your first gun, do a bit of what we were required to do in Infantry basic training. Learn everything there is to know about the thing. Be sure all live ammunition is in the other room, then play with the gun. Take it apart and clean it. Put it back together again. Operate the safety over and over. Get to know everything there is to know about the weapon. Be certain you can handle the thing in the dark, with your eyes closed, and know exactly what you are doing. Then go to a shooting range or any safe, approved place, and practice firing that gun. Practice all you were taught about safe gun handling, and make sure you know how to hit your target.

Respect your weapon. In Army basic, woe be unto the rookie who got careless and dropped his rifle. He would have to carry it with him twenty four hours a day. Carry it to mess hall. Take it to bed with him. And never, ever let it get dirty.

If you buy a gun, put a trigger lock on it and store it safely somewhere without that period of total, intimate familiarization, you are asking for trouble.

And, above all, protect your gun. In the Army, a rifle is called a "piece". I remember a salty old non-com saying words to the effect that "In civilian life you had a piece (meaning girlfriend) whom you would protect against any danger. In the Army, your rifle is your piece. Protect it the same way." Twice in my lifetime I have let one of my guns fall into someone else's possession. In both instances, they were used in some abusive fashion. It is one thing to learn gun safety yourself. It is another to risk letting some untrained person have access to your gun - even for a moment.

Okay, I apologize for the sarcastic title of this post. I really feel sorry for Plaxico. He made a mistake - a dangerous one. He is being punished severely. Don't let it happen to you.

What's wrong
with universal health care?

So far as health care is concerned, not much is wrong with the universal health care we now have. Other than being pretty unfair. Every hospital has an emergency room. If you are sick, you can go there to be treated. They would like you to pay. If you cannot, the law says they must treat you anyway. Is that fair?

Supposing you were hungry and ordered a meal in a restaurant. They would like you to pay, but if you could not, should they be required to feed you anyway? Hey... you'll die if you don't eat!

What's wrong with the universal health care being proposed by our government? One word: Government.

Recently I've seen TV commercials for something called "Angie's List". These commercials tell of a plumber who performed far above and beyond what he was paid to do. He is highly recommended. Then there is the painting contractor whose employee, in a pique, stomps off the job tracking paint across the customer's carpet. Avoid this outfit.

We all know about the Better Business Bureau, a private, franchised outfit that catalogs complaints against business establishments in their locality. If you want to hire a contractor, or buy a car from a used car lot, call the BBB. They'll tell you of complaints they have received from earlier customers.

Past performance counts. It is an indicator of how an outfit may perform in the future.

So, we are now offered a health care program by an outfit called the Federal Government. Let's check their past performance.

Benjamin Franklin conceived a postal service as a reliable way for us to exchange letters. To be run by the U.S. Government. Good idea... better than leaving letters at the local tavern for your friends to pick up.

I can't know what Franklin proposed the service would cost. I imagine he believed the service could charge each patron a small fee per letter, which would cover all costs. But each succeeding Congress heaped on more free services for the USPS to perform, so the fee had to be raised. The original objective - delivering letters - had to be somewhat curtailed.

Then Congress decided that a Postmaster, unlike any other business manager, could not fire an employee without hearings, etc., so the easy way was to just keep loafers on the payroll. The USPS became bloated and inefficient.

Throughout my youth, the cost to deliver a letter was 3¢. At the moment it is 47¢. That's a rise of 1,567%, and the USPS is still losing money. $7 Billion this year. Another $7 Billion projected for next year. With our current population, a billion dollars amounts to about $3.25 for every man, woman and child. For a family of four, the $7B Post Office deficit amounts to about $90. a year. That would have mailed 3,000 letters when I was a kid.

Will someone please call Angie's list?

When I was 13 and took my first job away from the family farm, the government informed me that I was now the proud owner of a retirement insurance policy, and that I would pay a premium, a percent of every paycheck I ever earned, throughout my working lifetime. Also, every employer I ever worked for would match that premium. Never mind details like total premiums or eventual benefits - they would work that out later.

Each succeeding Congress became more benevolent. They extended benefits to people who never paid a premium. They added hospital bills and doctor bills, and prescription drugs. They never considered that improved health care would help people live longer.

They needed money for other things. so instead of investing our premiums as private insurance companies do, they spent the money. Now they tell us the system is going broke and they may not be able to pay the promised benefits.

Will someone please call the Better Business Bureau?

Similar stories can be told about Amtrak. Veteran's hospitals. Land management. You name it.

We can debate HR3200 all day. We can read, dissect and quote the Senate bill - if and when it is ever written. But none of that matters. Past performance indicates that any health care program initiated and run by the United States Government is going to swell to unimagined costs, and never, ever provide the benefits it promises.

Does our health care system need reform? Indeed it does. We must eliminate restrictions on buying health insurance across state lines. As Dr. Charles Krauthammer suggested, we must "end malpractice lawsuits." (Quit making attorneys like John Edwards rich, and end costly defensive medicine.) "We must end employer provided health care." (This practice, incidentally, arose when government mandated wage and price controls forbade employers from giving raises to attract and hold valued employees. In lieu of raises, they gave them free health insurance.) "Tax employer-provided health-care benefits and return the money to the employee with a government check to buy his own medical insurance, just as he buys his own car or home insurance."

Let's tackle these problems one at a time. Let's debate them. Let's have knowledgeable people on all sides contribute their ideas. Let's do it right.

What can you do? Call Congress. Write Congress. Then call them again and write them again. Let's keep their computers and their telephones and their mail boxes overloaded until they understand what we insist they do.

The New Miracle Meat


I saw a TV news story this morning, stating that goat meat is the most widely consumed meat in the world... except in the U.S., where it amounts to only about 2% of the total meat eaten.

However, they say, that is changing. Goat meat has more of the good stuff, like protein & flavor; and less of the bad stuff, like fat and cholesterol. So, goat meat is now called the new miracle meat and is appearing on more restaurant menus.

About time!

I've liked goat meat ever since the first time I ate it at a Restaurant called The Bahamian Kitchen in Nassau. My wife wouldn't eat it because she doesn't like curry! Her loss!



I've liked goats a lot longer. In fact, I have long insisted that the goat, not the dog, is the animal that should be rated "man's best friend." Goats were one of the earliest animals domesticated for agricultural purposes. Uncounted millions of people have survived on goat milk and/or goat meat, while clothed in garments made from goat fiber or goat skin. I understand kid skin was once used to make 'bottles' for wine and is still used to make fine gloves. Goats eat plant material - any of it, including weeds, and are happy to live in the barn. This little animal, since biblical times, has sustained mankind.

I once owned a goat - a little, white nanny. She was a great pet but got me in trouble when she jumped onto the hood of my Dad's new car to nibble leaves from an overhanging tree limb. As a matter of fact, she loved to jump up onto any elevated surface, be it the dog house or a chicken coop. Guess it was some residual mountain goat genes.

Dogs are, indeed, trainable to be seeing eye dogs, and to work cattle or sniff for drugs, explosives and cadavers. They can do guard duty. But beyond that, they are disgusting animals. They pee on your carpet. Crap on your lawn. They bark and they bite. They love road kill and long to smell like it. They lick the nastiest places then lick your face or hands.

Cats are not readily trainable (I say 'readily' because someone out there has surely trained a cat to do something), but I haven't seen any seeing-eye-cats. But they still make cleaner, quieter companions than dogs.

So when it comes to animal friends of humans, goats should surely be first. Dogs edge cats for second place because of their train ability. But, they should always be housed in a kennel. If you want a house pet - make it a cat.

If I were running schools.

We'd be in big trouble because I don't know squat about education. But there sure would be some changes.

I've expressed my opinion about math education. But, again, before we baffle kids with multiplying letters and numbers and adding all sorts of little symbols and new words, like exponential, multiplicand, etc., let's teach the fun part of math. Want to multiply 17 by 12? Write it down and take two times seven, bring down the four and carry the one. Then two times one, add the carried one and bring it down. Or, just teach that multiplying by 12 is to multiply by ten and by two. 10 times 17 is 170. 2 times 17 is 34. 170 and 34 equal 204. Why make it harder? Once they learn the principal, they can move on.

History. In school we read about wars. Place names we cannot pronounce. Generals names we cannot remember. Dates, dates, dates. Who cares. In school I read about a Civil War battle in a place they called The Wilderness. Didn't remember where it was, when it was, or who was commanding the opposing forces. Years after school, I read about that battle in a book by Bruce Catton. A large Union force was moving along a road through a woods when their commanders decided it was time to camp for the night. Strung along the road, the men stacked their arms nearby, removed their boots to rest tired feet, and proceeded to eat what food they had available.

Suddenly, from the woods behind them, a deer came charging down the road. Frightened and confused by the large body of men, the deer should have returned to the safety of the woods from whence it had come. It did not. The reclining soldiers laughed at the animal, and proceeded about their campsite rituals. Suddenly the cause of the deer's panic became known. A huge Confederate force, in a line perpendicular to the camping Union forces, marched out of the woods and assaulted the resting troops. Unable to escape, the Union soldiers were slaughtered and the enemy forces moved on down the road. As the battle passed them by, the woods became silent again, except for the moans and screams of dying men, calling for help that never came.

The Battle of The Wilderness. You can always look up the details. But remember those men and boys, strewn, dying, along that wilderness road. Why don't people ever learn the horrors of war? Because they are never taught those horrors.


Democracy. I would require every child to memorize the first ten amendments to the constitution, which constitute the Bill of Rights. Not word for word, but the spirit of each right. It is easy, really. There once was a TV program called "Eight is Enough". That is how I remember the 8th Amendment: "No excessive fines; No excessive bail; No cruel and unusual punishment." Okay, maybe young kids today never heard of "Eight Is Enough", but surely clever teachers can think up other memory tricks to make the job easy. But kids should know the Bill of Rights from an early age. Can you describe all 10 amendments?

Capitalism. Some years ago a small businessman in Arkansas opened a general merchandise store. His plan was to offer lower prices and better service with the creed that the customer is always right. Sam Walton called his store Wal-Mart. My oldest brother-in-law (now 89), then also from Arkansas, bought a small TV set from Wal-Mart. After a time it quit working and he carried it back to the store. Without condemnation or accusation, the manager of the Wal-Mart asked if he wanted to replace the TV. When the answer was yes, the manager said, "Well, go back to the display and pick up a new one." No cost, no obligation, no questions... Wal-Mart just replaced the defective unit.

My brother-in-law now lives in Texas. Visit him and ask about a good place to buy just about anything. He will point you to Wal-Mart. Honest dealing, low prices and customer service has built old Sam Walton's store into the largest retailer in the world. But today, people are demonizing Wal-Mart. Why? Because Hollywood and the entertainment industry at large, have chosen to attack America's business community. I would beat them to the punch in school. Teach what it takes to start and run a business. The costs. The risks. The hard work. The number of people who fail and lose it all, with no reward.


Geography. Very few Americans know anything about geography beyond their realm of familiarity. Can't we find a way to make geography interesting and memorable?

The joy of learning... and, it's free! My goal would be to make every child eager to go to school each day.

Remembering Duke and Dan

When I was 13, my dad bought a team of work horses. Duke was solid black. Dan was a sorrel - a sort of reddish brown. These were big, broad-backed horses, capable of pulling heavy loads. Both were sold as "broke to harness". We led them home and turned them to pasture. The next morning we harnessed the team and attempted to hitch them to some sort of two-horse farm implement, probably a cultivator.

Duke was the sweetest animal one could imagine. He stood quietly in his harness, waiting for "instructions". Dan went wild. He seemed impossible to control. Much too excited. Much too nervous. After some period of time trying to calm the big horse, my Dad gave up and we led Dan back to the place where we had bought him. The horse salesman threw a harness on Dan, hitched him to a one-horse cultivator, and proceeded to cultivate a garden patch.

My father was born in 1893. He grew up with horses. He had a deep scar on his right temple, marking the point of impact of a horseshoe where he was kicked in the head - and into a coma - when he was a lad. So serious was the injury that his father proceeded to build a coffin for his son.

But dad recovered and led a very normal life. Horses having been a big part of it.

We led Dan home and turned him to pasture. The next morning, Dan was harnessed again, and again went wild. Once more we returned him to the "used horse lot". Once again the sales person harnessed Dan and proceeded to demonstrate that the big sorrel was well trained and gentle as a kitten. Dan in tow, we returned home once more.

The next morning, Dad was sure he had the answer to Dan's behavior. For some reason this horse had to be "warmed up". Can you imagine an athlete who, before taking to the gridiron, runs several laps around the field, then engages in a series of physical exercises? Anyway, Dad hitched the horses to a wagon and took them for a trot down the road. In about a mile or so, we reached a wide spot, turned the team and wagon around and returned home. Dan, then hitched to the cultivator, performed splendidly.

Duke, on the other hand, seemed to have a human-like understanding of what had to be done. Among other crops, we had a large patch of watermelons. One day I set out to cultivate the patch with Duke pulling a little one-horse cultivator. He set out like he intended to finish the job before lunch... much too fast for me to control the implement he was pulling. I reined him to a stop and walked around to his head. There, far from any other human observation, I took hold of his bridle and explained the problem. Yes, young farm boys do things like talking to horses.

When I again took my position behind the implement and clucked for Duke to move out, he just leaned forward into his collar, ever so slowly tightening the traces that would pull the cultivator. "C'mon, Duke, let's go", I encouraged. Duke took one step, then another, and proceeded to pull the cultivator carefully forward. We continued slowly through the patch, ripping up the soil and removing weeds between the watermelon "hills".

Once I had to go somewhere on the farm and decided to ride Duke. We had no saddle, so I mounted him bareback. Some breeds of riding horses can glide along in a smooth and even gait. Duke was not one of those horses. After plodding along in a slow walk for some distance, I encouraged the big horse to hurry. He launched into his awkward, bouncing gate. Astraddle his wide back, my legs spread far apart, I bounced about a foot into the air and landed hard on his back. The landing mashed my testicles and I experienced pain I had never known. Trying to grasp myself where it hurt, I fell from Duke's back landing in a fetal position in the dirt.

I don't recall how long it took for the pain to become bearable, but when it did, I was aware that I was being pushed about. It was Duke. He continued to nuzzle me until I took hold of his reins and staggered to my feet. When I fell, Duke had stopped running, turned around and returned as though to be sure I was okay.

There has never been a grazing animal that did not think the grass was greener on the other side of the fence. One time Duke arrived at that conclusion and stepped one front leg across an old barbed wire fence. The wire was loose and springy and when Duke tried to withdraw that front leg, he found that he could not. The wire was caught behind his ankle. It was necessary for him to lean forward until his leg was free, then raise his hoof high above the sagging wire, and back himself into his own pasture. Instead, he swung his leg back and forth, the barbs on the fence wire cutting into the back of his ankle. When I found him, blood was spurting from the wound.

I freed Duke's leg and led him to the barn. I was alone on the farm that day, but remembered having been told that tea leaves would help blood to clot. Securing Duke in his stall, I ran to the house and grabbed mother's supply of tea leaves. Returning to the barn I sat on the floor next to Duke's front leg and held a handful of dry tea leaves tightly against the wound.

Eventually it did stop bleeding. Whether or not the tea helped or hurt, I'll never know, but Duke healed and seemingly suffered no long term consequences.

Dad built a wagon on an old automobile chassis, retaining the rubber tires. That wagon rode like a cloud behind Duke and Dan, and I made some extra money hauling things for nearby farmers.

I loved those big horses. Today, some sixty-plus years later, I can no longer remember what happened to Duke and Dan. My father probably sold the horses. Surely they are both long since dead now, and while I do not believe in an after life for horses, it is pleasant to imagine them somewhere, grazing knee-deep in clover with not a barbed wire fence in sight.

Electric cars.
Some day - just not yet.

If you drive the highways of the west, where the distance between point "A" and point "B" may be hundreds of miles, it is a great gift of technology to be able to cruise at 75 miles per hour in a big, new car. The climate inside the car is perfectly controlled for your comfort. You are surrounded by a steel frame and airbags for safety. Your seat is comfortable and instantly adjustable for your greater comfort. The stereo plays your favorite CD. Radio - local or satellite - entertains or informs. Your speed is automatically maintained.

Just thinking of making the same trip in one of those golf cart size electric cars sends a chill down your back. They have barely enough power to run their tiny motor... much less all the comfort extras.

Why should this be? You see a train on a track parallel to your highway, some 100 cars pulled along by a few locomotives running in tandem. Here are thousands of tons pulled along at, sometimes, speeds greater than the speed limit of your highway. These locomotives are pulling with electric motors.

So, why are electric cars so under powered? The difference is the source of the electric power to operate the motor. The rail locomotive has a huge diesel engine, turning a huge generator which powers the electric motor. This is an inefficient system, but is necessary because the internal combustion engine derives its power through RPM. It can develop a lot of horsepower, once it gets up to speed. To start moving a load from a standstill requires a clutch - or an automatic transmission. It is impossible to build either capable of starting in motion a load of thousands of tons.

The electric car must use a battery to provide power to run the motor. Current battery technology is much improved, and will some day be better still. But, today's batteries, are seriously lacking.

A lot of people want to invent and own the breakthrough technology that will one day permit batteries that can store power enough to drive automobiles as well as do today's gasoline or diesel engines. One of these researchers will one day hit the jackpot. Maybe it will be nano technology. Maybe something else. But I believe it will come.

Real cars powered by electricity are coming. Soon I hope. In the meantime, let's drill, drill, drill. Let's keep the cost of gasoline and diesel down to help the economy thrive. To keep those dollars at home in the U.S.! To help fund those researchers working on new batteries.

Mathematics - the fun subject.
Recently, my college professor son mentioned that today's college students are flocking to the study of social sciences, largely to avoid mathematics.

What?

Why would anyone want to avoid math? Mathematics is a great subject - fun because it is full of interesting patterns. Easy because the answers are precise.

In that same conversation, he mentioned one interesting pattern. If you square a series of numbers, the difference between the squares of any two numbers is always two more than the difference between the squares of the two preceding numbers. In case you have forgotten, to square a number is to multiply it by itself, and is indicated in math with a small "2" written to the right of the number to be squared. The square of 2 is 2 X 2, and is written as 2². The square of 3 is 3 X 3, written 3².

Okay, as I was saying, 2² = 4. And, 3² = 9. The difference between 4 and 9 is 5. Continuing, 4² = 16. The difference between 16 and 9 (the square of 3) is 7. That is an increase of two over 5. Now if we square 5, we get 25, which is 9 more than 16, which is two more than 7. This pattern will continue as long as you want to square and subtract numbers. Now, if you don't find that at least a little bit interesting, your brain has been twittered - or tweeted - into terminal numbness.

But, this is only the beginning of the surprises in math. If you don't like multiplication or division, just fall back on addition and subtraction, You can, with logarithms. Every number has a logarithm. To get the logarithm (which is often shortened to just "log") of a number, you can go to a log table. When I was studying electronics, we used a slide rule to find the log of a number. Today there are calculators and computer programs to do the job. Anyway, to multiply two numbers, just find the log of each, add them together, and find the anti-log of the result. That result wil be the same as if you had multiplied the first two numbers. For division, just subtract the log of the second number from the log of the first, find the antilog of the result, and it is the same as if you had divided the first number by the second. Sure it is extra steps, but very helpful if you are multiplying or dividing complex numbers.

The study of mathematics can be one of wonder and joy. When I was studying mathematics, I found myself repeatedly saying, "Well, I'll be darned... that is amazing!" Sometimes I thought ahead of my then current level of study and wondered, "How do they know that?". When the answer was finally explained, it was a delight.

Knowledge of mathematics is core to many scientific disciplines. It is well to study math in college. How do you teach a child that mathematics is not a subject to be feared? Start early with simple number games. Make them fun. Learn shortcuts. Suppose you are watching a telecast of the Tour de France. The TV screen says the riders have 25 km to go. How far is that in mles?

Well, you could grab a calculator and multiply 25 by 0.62 and see that it is about 15.5 miles. But most people find that difficult to do "in their head" without calculator, or paper and pencil. Here's a shortcut you can easily do without calculator or pencil: divide the km (25) by 10, to get 2.5. Double that to 5.0. Multiply by 3 and you have 15. Actually, that is equal to multiplying the KM by 0.6, not 0.62. If you want a more accurate answer, multiply the 25 by 0.2 and add that to your original answer. But the shortcut is close enough, if you are only satisfying a moment of curiosity. And, certainly close enough to check your result if you go for the long, accurate computation. Your answer better be close to 15... not 150 or 1.5, either of which would mean you had misplaced a decimal point.

There are many such shortcuts in math, and just finding them is a great way to start making math a fun game.

Can anyone explain to me
why the term "lobbyist" has come to mean something evil?

The First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, the opening salvo of the Bill of rights, protects the right of citizens to petition their government for the redress of grievances.

The generally accepted definition of a lobbyist is someone who tries to influence legislation by influencing legislators. Does that not mean to "petition" them? If I seek redress of a grievance, but am personally dereft of the powers of persuasion, can I not ask you to speak on my behalf? Do you not then become a lobbyist? And who is this "government' we have the right to petition? Is it not a member of the legislature - which our Constitution guarantees the full power to create legislation?

I hear references to "undue" influence by lobbyists. Where in that 1st amendment does it proscribe limits to a citizen's petition?

The problem seems to be that the Constitution has been over interpreted. Too many great minds have expanded the meaning of those simple, clear sentences crafted by the founders. In broadcasting, we used to say: "K.I.S.S. - keep it simple, stupid". The Founders kept it simple. Why have we complicated it? The solution seems to be that we return to those simple, clear snetences.

Maybe it was John McCain (the very guy who comdemns lobbyists), in an appearance on the television program "The View" during the last presidential campaign, who suggested that return.

Whoopee Goldberg, one of the foolish voices on that program, began mouthing about a return to slavery, which existed when the Constitution was written.

Wait a minute, Whoopee... read the 9th amendment: It assures that enumeration of rights in the Constutution (which rights did NOT include slavery) could not be construed to deny citizens other rights. For further clarification, the 10th amendment spells out that any powers not specifically granted to the Federal Government or specifically denied to the states by the Constitution, are reserved to the states, or to the people!

The only thing clearer, perhaps, was Ayn Rand's explanation: The citizen has the right to do anything not specifically prohibited by law, so long as it does not infringe upon the rights of fellow citizens. Conversely, the government has no rights unless specifically permitted by law. Seems to me that enslaving a person would certainly infringe upon his or her right to liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

Palin: No one will value it,
but here is my opinion.

Sarah Palin held her resignation news conference one week ago, but I just read another columnist's examination of "why she quit". Being genetically disposed to be a motormouth, I can be silent no longer.

Some years ago I knew a young lawyer who was very idealistic and very disturbed with the political turn of events in his state. He decided to enter politics to make things better. He filed as a candidate for a seat in the Missouri Legislature's House of Representatives. The law firm where he was employed took little interest in his candidacy. Some friends of mine who were in the advertising business helped him write copy for flyers which he personally distributed door to to door.
When he was elected, the seniors in his law firm called him into a meeting and spelled out the agenda they wanted him to follow as a legislator. It was entirely opposite of what this young man had in mind and he refused. Eventually his employment situation became untenable and he resigned the job.
In the legislature, he confronted one stone wall after another. I no longer remember the time span it all took, or how many terms he served. But one day he reached the conclusion that there was nothing constructive he could accomplish in the state legislature, and at the end of the term, he walked away.

Most of us Conservatives yearn for politicians who truly care about their community, their country. We wrongly conclude that all politicians are egotistic maniacs, stumbling through their terms, concentrating only on being reelected. That's too bad. There are still people like the young, idealistic lawyer who try, but party hacks and special interest pros wear them down, one way or another.

Sarah Palin certainly is an idealist. Her entire public record proves that conclusively. She saw and struggled against corruption with no regard for party lines. She was successful in all of her Alaska endeavors. But when she entered the national scene, she was met by the real pros at the politics of personal destruction. Some crafty mind among them discovered that you could completely hogtie a political office holder by simply filing ethic complaints, one after the other. The law rightly requires that complaints be investigated, no matter how frivolous they may seem on the surface.

In the span of six months or so, Palin came to the realization that she, personally, had wasted a half million dollars - enough to put all of her children through college - defending herself against the false charges. Worse, the state she loved and wanted to protect, had spent four times that amount. Never mind that all charges were proven false and were dismissed. She, and those around her, knew that the charges would continue. Why would they stop? They were taking their toll, and it cost nothing to lodge them.

In Palin's case, she saw that the problem was her personal popularity on the national political stage. At her side was a Lieutenant Governor who shared her political ideals and goals. With no apparent national political ambitions, he would be of little interest to the destroyers. She could remove herself from the picture, put a stop to the financial bleeding of her family and her state, and still see her objectives for clean state government realized. She had only one choice.

Would resignation destroy her political career? Perhaps. Would it allow her to continue to pursue her goal of making a change in the political climate of the country she loved? Absolutely! And that was her true ambition.

For this, I feel a great personal debt to Sarah Palin. Do I think she'll run for some higher political office? I hope so - we need people like Sarah Palin. But that decision is hers to make. In the meantime, if she appears in my area in support of some candidate or another, you can bet I will turn out to hear her speak, and I will vote for the candidate she supports.

As a postscript, I might add that a similarly evil tactic was used against Mitt Romney. When Mitt ran for president he was already out of office, so his enemies needed a different line of attack. Romney didn't have a lot of vulnerabilities. But, Mitt was not a Catholic, or a Baptist, or a follower of any of the other heavily populated religions. He was a Mormon. Nobody had any bad information about Mormons, but their numbers were fewer. Perhaps it would be possible to stir up feelings of prejudice against Mitt, because of his religion.

To his great credit, and unlike Barack Obama who quickly deserted his church when it became politically expedient to do so, Mitt Romney stuck by his religious beliefs. Why? Because he really believed them!
Is religion what defeated Mitt Romney? We'll never know. But we do know that every little impediment can diminish the chance of winning a race, be it swimming, bike racing, even a horse race... or a political campaign.
UPDATE:
When I wrote this, I titled it "Palin: My 2¢ Worth", meaning, "no one will value this, but here is my opinion. When I looked at the post I thought that was a pretty dumb title, one that everyone might use. To check this, I did a Google search for "Palin: My 2¢ Worth" and Google found 46,500,000 pages. To be fair, not all were about Palin, some were just about "My 2¢ Worth".
Aren't people funny?

Tour de France

You may have never ridden a bicycle, but you surely are hearing about this 96th running of the Tour de France bicycle race. American Lance Armstrong, who won the race seven years in a row, brought it to the forefront of the consciousness of most Americans.

For me, however, it is quite different. I watch the Tour in wonder... how do these guys do it?

I bought my first bicycle 67 years ago. Raised on a farm in Missouri, it was a long way from home to anywhere I wanted to go. No one will ever know how badly I wanted a bicycle, but buying food and other basic life necessities sucked up all the family resources in the 1930s. It was impossible for my parents to afford a bicycle for me.

I used to run down those country roads, holding my hands in front of me, as if I were holding on to handlebars, stepping high to imitate the leg motion of riding the pedals of a bike.

Finally, in 1941, I managed to earn and save a few dollars. Six, as a matter of fact! A friend of mine who had just turned old enough to get a driver's license, had grown tired of his bicycle and said he would sell it for eight dollars. Somehow my mother scraped two dollars from the family living cache, and we went to consummate the deal. My friend was not at home, but his mother took the eight dollars and gave me the bike. An old Schwinn, fat tire model. God I loved that bike.

I have owned several bikes since then. This morning, like every morning, I headed out on my little Trek mountain bike for a 45-minute ride. It was gorgeous at 5:30 a.m.! In the west, the full moon was hanging low in the sky, turning a bit orange as it neared the horizon. To the east, the sun was climbing behind the Organ mountains, painting the overhanging clouds a wonderful, glowing neon orange. The temperature was 76º. Breeze about 5 mph. Life was good. This morning my average speed was 8.6 miles per hour. Top speed was 16.5. Duration of ride was 0:45:25. Total distance, 6.5 miles. I thought about the riders in the Tour, averaging over 25 miles per hour for many hours. How do they do it?

None of my early bikes had an odometer. The odometer on my current Trek is nearing 4,000 miles. My other Trek has logged over 6,000 miles. Ten thousand miles - like coast-to-coast three times. That's a lot of wonderful hours on a bike.

When my youngest daughter was about eight years old, She had a bike... they weren't fancy in those days, and probably a real chore to pump up hills. I rolled out my latest Schwinn, a 3-speed model I had won in a contest, and took her for a ride. Foolishly I headed us out on a two-lane highway and ended up riding perhaps 20 miles round trip.

Our turn-around point was an ancient Indian burial ground a local farmer had discovered and turned into a bit of a tourist attraction. We left him a souvenir from our radio station. Years later, as an adult, she re-visited that place and found that the owner still had the souvenir we had given him. He returned it to her.

I still shudder to think of all that could have gone wrong on that long ride with that little girl, but she never complained once. Lance Armstrong would have been proud!

When my youngest son was about the same age, I bought him his first bike. He was really having trouble getting up even the smallest hills. Upon close examination, I discovered that the crank, the pedals, were equipped with a plastic sleeve, not a ball bearing. Ouch. We bought him a small Schwinn, and his riding improved immeasurably. Today, at 36, he owns a quality road bike and rides every day that weather and his schedule permit.

Riding a bicycle is great exercise. But it is so much more than that. This morning I saw three jack rabbits and two cottontails, along with the moon set and the sun rise. If you own one of those stationary indoor bikes, sell the damn thing and get yourself out on the road. Early morning, if possible! What a way to start a day!

Who knows, maybe you'll see this eighty year old kid soaking up the joy of riding his own bike!

Obesity Optimizer

Getting too thin? Help is on the way! Peppers Cafe, a part of a local restaurant in my town, is now serving what they call "The World's Largest Green Chile Cheeseburger". Forget the "Two all beef patties" relic of yore. This new entry has one patty - a full pound of ground beef - served on a ten-inch bun!

Wow! Just what our fat population needs!

It's on the menu at $18.95, plus tax and tip.

Bad people and REALLY bad people.

For some reason, bad people are given more attention than good people. History books detail the evil deeds of people like Adolph Hitler, who personally caused death and pain to so many. But history ignores millions of others who spent their entire lives as good citizens, who dealt with their fellow man according to the kind of compact described by the philosopher Epicurus (342-271 B.C) 'not to harm or be harmed'.

But history also ignores - or incorrectly records - the deeds of those I see as really bad people. My all-time leader on that list is one Rachel Carson. Back in 1962, Carson wrote a book called Silent Spring. That book is often cited as the birth of the modern environmental movement. Rah Rah!

But the one thing Silent Spring really accomplished was the worldwide ban of the insecticide DDT. Carson advanced the not conclusively proven belief that DDT caused birds to lay eggs that would not hatch because the shells were too thin.

But, the ban on DDT gave a new lease on life to the anopheles mosquito, the conveyor of malaria. Before the ban, malaria was almost eradicated. Since the ban, millions have died from malaria. It is estimated that 1,000 African children die from malaria every day. That makes Hitler's death camps seem small by comparison.

Today, more really bad people are at work. Take the U.S. Congress' House of Representatives. That body just passed the so-called 'Cap & Trade' energy bill. The bill they passed was 1,200 pages with a 300 page amendment, that none of them had read. Not only was it unreadable, some experts are now saying it was not even written at the time of the vote. Some group of persons, with some kind of evil motive, sat at word processors and ground out 1,500 pages of gibberish which had no intelligent meaning. Then, those really bad people used the power we had in good faith given them, to advance that to become the law of the land! A fully enforceable law they would slam down on us.

How bad would that law be? That depends entirely on what the final bill will say. A few things are certain. We will never know who the final authors/editors will be. The president who would sign it will not have read it. Some people, somewhere, would become very rich because of it. More would become poor because of it. Not exactly the compact Epicurus had in mind.

Priorities???

I liked Michael Jackson. I thought he was an extraordinary talent and have often said that when you practice something from the cradle you will get very, very good at it. Jackson did that.

I never believed any of the pedophile charges. A famed attorney once repeated endlessly to a jury: "If it doesn't fit you must acquit". In my opinion, the charges of child molestation against Jackson never did fit. Not even close. Like much of the world I was saddened by the death of this lonely famous man.

Now, can we stop talking about him?

When Dwight Eisenhower died, I was General Manager of a radio station in Salina, Kansas, just 25 miles from Eisenhower's home town of Abilene, Kansas. Ike was well liked everywhere. He was especially well liked in Kansas.

General Eisenhower was the Allied Supreme Commander in Europe in world War II. He engineered the Normandy invasion, which liberated Europe. At wars end, Ike was elected president. His first act, even before inauguration, was to go to Korea and stop the killing in the Korean War which Harry Truman had exacerbated but could not end.

Eisenhower then presided over an eight year presidency of peace and prosperity. People often refer to that period as a ho-hum presidency, but Eisenhower gave us a balanced budget. For younger readers, that means the government did not spend more than it took in. Amazing.

Perhaps Ike's greatest legacy is the Interstate Highway system. Before Ike, we made our way across country on two-lane highways. With steep hills, big trucks were slowed and there were few passing opportunities. I have driven from Kansas City to St Louis behind a big truck almost the entire journey. Get an opportunity to pass one and you soon overtake - and are stuck behind - another. Ike realized this could be a fatal obstruction to the rapid movement of military forces in the event of a national emergency, and initiated a nationwide system of high speed, limited access highways. The Interstate Highway System.

Dwight Eisenhower was a very important leader in our nation's history.

What has this to do with Michael Jackson? When Eisenhower died, I stopped the broadcast of all commercials on my radio station and programmed only quiet, respectful music as a memoriam to this great former general and former president whose hometown was well within our coverage area. I was widely criticized for this act. Even some of our station's stockholders were critical. So, after only a few hours time, I resumed regular programming.

Harry Truman once said he was amazed at the celebrity accorded the office of the president. I am amazed at the much greater attention and devotion heaped upon entertainers and athletes. Michael Jackson died. That is very sad. Now shut up about it. Time to resume regular programming.

Only in America?

Heading out for my bike ride at 5:30 this morning, I loaded my bike on the back of my old Cherokee, then picked up the newspaper lying at my feet in the driveway. The headline read: 'Crowds Pack In for 'Transformers' .

What the heck are 'Transformers'? Maybe some kind of new and highly advanced military gear? After all, the Physical Sciences Laboratory at NMSU does operate a UAV (Unmanned Aerial Vehicle) Test Facility near here. Just over the mountain is White Sands Missile Range where the U.S, tests and tests shooting down missiles. Included there is HELSTF, the High Energy Laser Systems Test Facility, where even the Israeli government tested shooting down missiles or rockets with a laser. Twenty five miles north the new Spaceport is under construction. So, public demonstrations of new technological marvels are often held.

The headline was intriguing, but the morning bike ride in the desert was more appealing. Don't think riding in sand among cactus... I ride on paved streets and roads. But the cool, dry air of a pre-sunrise summer morning in our desert climate, may be the most appealing climatological experience on the planet.

I put the newspaper in the garage, and backed out of the driveway. The radio was on in the Jeep, and was tuned to a talk show. The host was talking about a new movie he had just seen, called 'Transformers'. Aha! Our newspaper had a headline... a front page, "A" section headline, about a movie, a creation of Hollywood, the world capital of foolishness?

First, the radio host was predicting how much money this thing would make. Over one hundred million this weekend, he guessed. Then he talked about the movie. Explosions? Biggest ever. Did you see 'Armageddon'? that was nothing. 'Transformers I'? That was nothing!

So, people may spend $100 million this weekend to see a bunch of filmed explosions? Well, I may well go see a fireworks display on July 4. But at least it will be free, and I don't have to put up with some incomprehensible story line. Just watch the pretty flash. Hear the big boom.

We complain when asked to pay $3.00 for a gallon of gasoline (which will push our car twenty miles down the highway) but happily pay $2.00 for a 16-oz. bottle of water - that translates to $16.00 a gallon!

Maybe the difference is that we don't have to go see the movie. We don't have to buy the water. It's okay to waste time or money of your own free will. Just don't create a situation where we have to waste it!

Now we know!

Those brilliant people who figured out that humans (and now animals) are causing climate change which will warm up the planet, melt polar ice, cause oceans to overflow, etc., etc., have further enlightened us.

After setting in motion foolishness that will condemn us all to driving golf cart-sized autos on our Interstate hiways, the latest claim is that the real problem is animal flatulence. So, they are threatening what some in the U.S. Congress are calling the "Cow Fart Tax"!

There are a lot of cows in America (not to mention hogs, sheep, etc.). One dairy not far from my home, has some 30,000 cows! But that is nothing to the number of bison who once roamed the Great Plains. We are told that the herds numbered in the millions. Millions!

Imagine the quantities of methane gas they expelled. Since we now know that that gas causes global warming, the warming must have been intense in ancient America. All of the present day U.S. and Canada must have been tropical.

That, then, explains why there were so many palm trees - even alligators - in Minnesota and North Dakota!

???

Coming to New Mexico This Summer?
Here are some tips.

The cuisine called Mexican Food is sweeping the country. And, it is becoming more authentic. In 1950, I worked in Wisconsin for the summer. I once ordered a bowl of chili in a Wisconsin restaurant and was served what I considered a bowl of vegetable soup with a dash of chili powder. Today, in most of the U.S., a similar order would bring you something we call Texas chili... a dish made with beans, ground beef, and varying amounts of chili seasoning.

Actually, the name Mexican Food is, in itself, not authentic. It should accurately be called Southwest Food. While it is served in northern Mexico, other parts of that nation never heard of an enchilada, and many areas prefer seafood. In fact. one of the best fresh seafood dinners I ever ate was served in a beach side restaurant in Acapulco.

Back to New Mexico, where Southwest dishes are so popular there is a "Mexican Restaurant" on every other street corner, our state legislature actually passed a resolution declaring the Official State Question to be "Red or Green?". It is asked at every Mexican restaurant to determine if you want your meal seasoned with red chile or green chile. And, yes, in New Mexico we do use the Spanish spelling... C-H-I-L-E. Chili refers to that brown stuff from Texas - which we also serve, but more often than not, you will be served true Southwest chile, which contains neither beans or ground beef.

However, the Official Question has given way to a new version... "Red, Green or Christmas?". It seems a lot of us just can't decide if we prefer red or green chile, so we ask for both... red on one side, green on the other... now called "Christmas".

Sometimes you will hear a diner ask his server "Which is hotter?" That is because there are a lot of different chile varieties grown in the state. Green chile, which all chile peppers are before they ripen, ranges from a variety named Barker (which is too hot even for me, and I love hot chile), to Big Jim which I find to be not hot at all.

After chiles turn red they are dried, ground or crushed, and used for seasoning in numerous ways. Again, some species are much hotter than others, and if you are a new customer in a given restaurant, you won't know which kind of chiles they use.

Someone came up with what we call Scoville Heat Units (SHU) to rate the heat of a given chile variety. A common jalapeno chile measures about 10,000 SHU, while some New Mexico green chiles measure only about 1,500 SHU.

Since chiles are an important agricultural crop in New Mexico, New Mexico State University (an agricultural school) takes chile growing seriously and even has a Chile Pepper Institute, to help chile farmers grow varieties which are more drought resistant and more resistant to fungus and insects.

Abot two years ago, experts from the Institute discovered a chile variety in the northeast part of India. This variety, known as Bhut Jolokia, measures over one million SHU!

That's 100 times hotter than a jalapeno! Paul Bosland, director of the Institute, has even developed a hot sauce called "Holy Jolokia", which is to be sampled in moderation.

So, maybe a better question for your restaurant server would be, "Are you serving Bhut Jolokias?". Don't be surprised, however, if they answer as a young waitress recently answered me, "Oh, gosh... I just started first year Spanish and I don't understand that", even though the name comes from India and is not Spanish.

Lest we forget?

We already did!

We so often hear the phrase "Lest we forget" in reference to some historic event. We usually respond by vowing to remember. But we never do.

We forget everything that didn't have a personal impact. Even that is not a guarantee that we will remember.

A few years ago, on Veteran's Day, I wore my World War II veteran's pin, and asked people if they knew what it stood for. No one did. Even some guys who were old enough to be WW II vets themselves.

I emailed a local TV station's news department and asked if anyone knew what WW II vets meant when they referenced the "Ruptured Duck"? They did not reply. Probably thought it was some sort of obscene email.



Here's a pix of the pin, scanned from the back of a booklet issued to discharged servicemen and women after WW II.


I no longer have my original pin. It was the old-fashioned kind of lapel pin that actually fit into a button hole. I wore it one year on Veteran's Day and lost it. My son purchased a replacement for me - the kind that punches a small hole in the fabric and has a clip that snaps on the back.



I can't really fault people for not remembering the pin we called the ruptured duck. At the time of my own discharge from the U.S. Army, many of the vets tossed their vet's pin, and other metals and papers, in a trash can.

This past Memorial Day, I decided to try another experiment. Pretty silly, actually, no one could get this one.

I still have my father's Army dog tags from World War I. I consider that a bit remarkable inasmuch as he was discharged 91 years ago! So I wore them, hanging outside my shirt as I participated in the New Mexico Wine Grower's Association's Wine Festival at the Southern New Mexico State Fairgrounds. Here they are, the round ones, alongside my own rectangular dog tags from WW II.

Those two aluminum disks hanging on a chain aroused no one's curiosity. Finally I pointed them out to some friends, and they seemed duly impressed at the antiquity of the things.

At one point a guy who appeared to be in his late 50's, jokingly asked my wife if she gave a military discount on her artwork. I asked if he was active military and he replied affirmatively, explaining that he had been in the service for 38 years. Because of his unique specialty, he had been permitted to remain on active duty beyond the usual 30-year retirement.

So, I asked if he recognized my "necklace". He correctly guessed that they looked like dog tags, but could not identify them.

We both found it rather interesting that there are 14,606,500 numbers between my father's Army serial number, and my own. When I enlisted, a buddy enlisting with me was assigned a serial number one number higher than mine. Otherwise, I do not know how the Army assigns serial numbers. But it seems about right that there would have been over 14 million soldiers in the three decades that included World War II. I found it even more interesting that both my father's and my own serial number ended with the number 31.

I've tried to think of any way in which the number 31 was significant in either of our lives. No luck.

So, what does it do
to your hair???

We were going out of town for a long weekend. In our dishwasher, unwashed, were the dishes from last night's dinner and the morning's breakfast. No one wants to come home to a dishwasher full of dirty dishes, so we loaded the Glass Magic and Cascade, set the controls to Normal Wash, hit the start button and left.

Arriving home four days later we were surprised to find the dishes, not sparkling clean, but covered with a hazy coating. My wife wondered if we should call the Maytag repairman. I wondered if something had interrupted the machine's wash cycle, allowing the dishes to dry in soapy water.

We re-loaded the detergent and re-started the machine. At the end of cycle number two, there was no change. Glassware was still cloudy. Plates and dishes felt slippery. I wiped one glass with a paper towel and the stuff came off, but not entirely, it still left an oily coating.Then I saw a suspect. Before leaving town, I had emptied a pump bottle of Dove Hair Conditioner in the shower. After shaking out all the material possible, my wife looked at the well-made pump bottle and allowed that there may be some future life for this item. She rinsed it and stuck it in the dishwasher along with the dirty dishes. It was the residual hair conditioner that had left a coating on the dishes.

We now discarded the hair conditioner bottle, but it took two more cycles to get things clean.So, what does this stuff do to your hair? I've often wondered just what they meant by "conditioning" your hair. Now I know - it coats it with an oily substance! And I thought I was through with an oily head when I gave up on Vaseline Hair Tonic! It makes sense. We've all seen a small child with freshly shampoo'd but "unconditioned" hair which static charge causes to stand wildly on end. Oiling it down makes it lie down. Makes it shine. Keeps it from tangling.

Good stuff for your hair. Just keep it out of your dishwasher!

Posted by Sam Bradley - 5/27/2009 10:21:00 AM 2 comments

Time to Burnish My Reputation
- as an opinionated old man!

Here's my take on some current events:

1. Obama: All through the 2008 campaign, some of us kooks said Obama was a fool. It took him less than four months in office to prove us right. But, we didn't know he was also a liar and a cheat. New bills will be published on the net before being signed into law. Still waiting, Prez! He stands shoulder to shoulder with the U.A.W., but calls retired Indiana State Police and teachers greedy for wanting their legally secured investments secure? Etc., etc. But, of course, if anything bad is happening it is Bush's bad! ;-)

2. California's budget mess: Screw 'em. They have millions of barrels of gold (black gold) just off their shores, waiting to be hauled up and put in the bank. Hey, that would even reduce seeping and minimize the risk of getting a tar stain on some beach beauty environmentalist's foot!

3. Health care costs: A. Immediately eliminate all medical mal-practice lawsuits. Dismiss any in progress. All they do is make more John Edwards type lawyers rich. The victims get their medical bills paid - which would probably happen anyway - and a little lump of cash to buy a wide-screen TV, or perhaps a new mobile home. Most goes to lawyers. B. Immediately end free emergency room care. No more treating sniffles in emergency rooms without cash in advance. If someone has a life threatening illness or injury, but no money, treat them, but only after an enforceable, ironclad arrangement for them to pay for their care. If the person is not a citizen, get a citizen to stand for their debt or put them on an ambulance home. C. End direct payment of medical bills by insurance companies. The patient must arrange full payment, then depend on getting a reimbursement from their insurance. Many non-life threatening medical procedures would be skipped if the patient saw the costs up front, and knew he had to pay them. D. Make some care options ala carte. You want a MRI with a million dollar machine? That will cost extra.

The War On Drugs
A Different Strategy

Harry Dimwit Reid loudly proclaimed that the war in Iraq was lost. General Petraeus quietly thought that maybe we needed a new strategy. He devised one and, presto, the Iraq War was won.

To paraphrase the late Senator Lloyd Bentsen in his famous Dan Quayle put-down, I ain't no David Petraeus, but I think we need a new strategy in the war on drugs. We've been fighting this war for too long, and it seems to be getting worse. We have tried education, "D.A.R.E"; we have tried enforcement, various drug czars, the DEA, border enforcement.

My friends and I used to go to Mexico about once a month because we loved the people, the food, the fun and the shopping. Today we are afraid to go because of the violent drug cartels. We need a new strategy and I think Abraham Maslow showed us one back in 1943 with his Hierarchy of Needs. To fight the use of drugs, we need to give people something they need more than a drug high!

Maslow said our greatest need is not physiological or even safety, but things like Esteem and self-actualisation. Some years ago I addressed a group of proprietary school administrators. It was an early spring day in Kansas City and we had just been hit by a late winter storm that dumped about a foot of wet, sloppy snow on the city. The storm hit after midnight, and at the early hour of our meeting sidewalks had not yet been cleared. Several in my audience challenged Maslow's theories until I pointed out that everyone in the audience was wearing a tailored suit, expensive shoes, etc. It was apparent that "looking good" in front of their peers was more important to these attendees than keeping their feet warm and dry on this snowy morning.

A more current example is our foolish, new president. Obama so loves being adored that he reminds me of a beagle I once owned. This little dog so loved the smell of carrion that if she came upon a road kill, she had to roll in it. She would lie on her back across some dead animal and move like she was scratching her back... anything to rub the odor deeper. Obama is so fond of the adulation of crowds, here and abroad, that he seemingly rolls in it. Homeland security? Naaaa. Not so important. That is so "Bush"!

You think there is no treat that would wean people off drugs? It is working with tobacco - or nicotine, if you prefer. I started smoking regularly when I was 15. I took a job with a company that serviced cigarette vending machines, for pity's sake. If a machine malfunctioned and damaged a package of cigarettes, the pack was thrown away... free smokes for the help! And that was when smoking was sooo cool. I recall the great Edward R. Murrow often photographed with a cigarette. FDR frequently had his long cigarette holder clenched in his teeth. Every movie showed glamorous people smoking. Catchy TV ads promoted cigs with phrases like "a silly milimeter longer" for 101s, or even said that doctors preferred a certain brand. Romantic songs referenced smoking. Johnny Carson smoked on the Tonight show.

We stopped all of that, but smoking only increased. We tried scaring people. I remember being accosted in a mall parking lot and having a big photo of a blackened lung, disected from some cadaver, crammed in my face. It had no effect. We taxed, and are still taxing! In the South Pacific we soldiers paid 75¢ for a carton of cigarettes. Ten packs. Six bits. Today, just the tax on one pack is more than that. We enforced prohibition of sales to minors. That only made smoking a prize you won on your 18th birthday.

Then, we began to make smoking "not cool". I'm not sure how it happened... but all of a sudden, smoking was just not the sort of thing really cool people did. Smoking has seriously declined.

Supposing we all did this... if a friend mentions smoking a little pot, or snorting cocaine, we recoil in disgust. A clear signal that, while we may not worry about the legality of drugs, we just think drug use is something we find repellent.

Gee! All those poor, misguided PETA souls would have something better to do than throw paint on some ladies fur coat. The global warmng goons could go for a cause that really did some good, instead of fighting for causes that punish innocent people.

I smoked for about thirty years and found it very satisfying. Then, I found something more satisfying and I quit, cold turkey. Nothing could make me quit - until I wanted to quit. Why not give old Abraham Maslow's idea a try?

Make NOT using drugs really cool!

When I hear Green, I See Red

Lately we’re hearing a lot more about organic farming. I used to think they just didn’t understand. Now it just makes me mad.

I grew up in the 1930s, when all farming was organic. The modern pesticides, herbicides and animal medications which saved the world from starvation, had not yet been invented, or simply were not available to poor dirt farmers.

I spent many, many fall afternoons walking alongside a horse-drawn wagon, picking corn. Little, scrubby nubbin ears of corn, four to six inches long, every one a host to at least one worm. We just didn’t have the pesticides to kill whatever laid the eggs that hatched the worms. The horses tails were a solid block of tangled hair and cockleburs, from the plants that grew between the rows of corn, because we had no herbicide to control them.

Then, there were the animal diseases. Once our entire winter-supply-of-pork-to-be was wiped out by a sudden infection of cholera.

Travel to Iowa today and see endless vistas of cornfields, beautifully clean of weeds. Visit in late fall and see thousands of perfectly shaped, 12 to 14 inch ears of corn, enough to feed half the world, fatten half the world’s livestock and still have some left to make fuel for cars and trucks.
Herds of beautifully healthy farm animals are everywhere, protected by modern vaccines and nutrients.

Some people just can’t stand that. They have to look in every corner, hoping desperately to find something terribly wrong with this magnificent picture. In 1962, one Rachel Carson wrote a book called "Silent Spring". Millions bought her Chicken Little predictions and the modern environmental movement was born.

This movement brought about the banning of DDT. The use of DDT had almost eradicated malaria. There is no scientific proof that DDT causes the harm to humans or birds, attributed to this fully safe pesticide. And since its ban, malaria now kills some two million people a year.

The Greens have successfully thwarted U.S. domestic drilling for oil and gas, causing America to send billions of dollars to countries who use much of that money to develop and support anti-American activities. House speaker Nancy Pelosi says she is trying to "Save the planet". I guess her planet does not include the Middle East, where drilling is apparently okay.

Now Greens are increasing their assault on American agriculture by popularizing the mythical benefits of "organic farming".

People think Adolph Hitler was the bloodiest killer of modern times, but the tragedy of his concentration camps pales in comparison to the harm inflicted by environmentalists.

How do the Greens respond to these accusations? Dr Charles Wurster, chief scientist for the Environmental Defence Fund, may have revealed how some environmentalists really feel about human beings when he was asked if people might die as a result of the DDT ban: 'Probably...so what? People are the causes of all the problems; we have too many of them. We need to get rid of some of them, and this is as good a way as any.

A Special Offer
To the decendants of our European Ancestors
(The ones who remained in the old countries)

We are really happy that you liked the new American president. He was affectionately greeted throughout his tour.

So, just to prove we still love you, here is our offer: You may keep Mr. Obama!

You may make him a King or a Chancellor, or a Prime Minister, or whatever title you choose to bestow on worthless politicians in your cute little countries.

You may fawn over him, idolize him, bow to him and applaud him to your hearts' content. You may fill your newspapers with glowing stories of your first African-European Whatever. You may give him a crown or a castle, or whatever accords with your particular ancient customs.

Meanwhile, back in the colonies, we can elect a president who will reverse the obscene government spending that threatens to rob our children and grand children of the blessings we have enjoyed since we left our ancestral homelands "over there" to come to these shores. (In the case of my family, well over three centuries ago.)

We can elect the kind of man or woman who would have destroyed that North Korean Missile on the launch pad before their Dear Leader pushed the launch button. Someone who, likewise, will remove Iran's nuclear capabilities immediately... just so we don't have to come back again and save your asses in another World War.

We can elect someone who will call a terrorist a terrorist and proceed to destroy their movement.

And then, perhaps, we will all live happily ever after - or at least a few years longer!

Fargo - Go Far - They're synonymous

Right now, the entire nation should be watching Fargo, North Dakota. Fargo is a city of about 100,000 of the most-American of all American people. It is situated on the west side of The Red River (just one of several U.S. rivers by that name), a stream that marks the North Dakota/Minnesota State Line. On the east side of the river, another 75,000 people call their town Moorhead, MN.

The area is part of the American Great Plains, where the terrain is pretty flat. It is also among the coldest spots in the "lower 48". The average low temp in January is 2º below zero, F.

It snows in Fargo, and when the average high temp is only 16º F. (as it is in January) the snow and ice just sit there on the ground, patiently waiting for spring - which comes late.

When spring does start to melt the accumulated snow and ice, there are no canyons and valleys to rapidly carry away the water. It just lazily starts to meander away from the fields - and the yards. Which, depending on the speed of the melt, always poses the danger of flooding. This year has been a doozy!

Which brings me back to the point. The good people of Fargo are not whining about their plight. They are, in the most-American American spirit, just reacting. In the few TV shots we see, the people turned out by the thousands to contain the rising Red River. You expect to see the big and the strong tossing sand bags. But in Fargo, you see the young and the old, men and women - some pretty small of frame - struggling to keep passing the heavy sand bags along.

If you've ever passed a sand bag, you are aware of the fact that sand bags defy natural law. Bags of sand of the exact same dimensions, get progressively heavier with time. The first one is not too bad. The 100th one is a killer. At 19º F., it takes considerably less than 100 to make muscles scream.

Well, it now seems that the immediate danger is receding. It appears that the Red River has crested for the moment, and the good people of Fargo are in the "watch and react" mode as they allow their aching muscles a respite.

We all hope the weather cooperates and allows some of the excess water to drain away before serious melting resumes. Whether or not that is the case, you can be assured that the people of the Fargo-Moorhead area will be quick to respond and slow to complain.

Are you listening, New Orleans?

Put my Dad in charge of the money!

My father died forty one years ago. I wish he were still alive and could be put in charge of supervising the use of the bailout money.

For many years, Dad drove a tank truck for Sinclair Refining Company, in Kansas City, Kansas. For the most part, his job was delivering gasoline to Sinclair service stations. Dad was short on formal education, long on common sense and extraordinarily high on integrity. He was very conscientious about his job and always aware of the danger inherent in a truckload of highly flammable gasoline.



When he was off-loading gasoline into the underground tanks at a service station, he always stood with his hand on the valve, ready to cut off the flow of gasoline in the event of a spill. One day, as he stood by his truck dumping gasoline, a man approached him and asked for a dime. He said he had a day's work promised him, if he could get to the job. Street car fare was 25¢ and he had 15¢. If dad would give him a dime, he could get to the job.

Dad admired people who tried to make it on their own, and quickly reached into his pocket for a dime. "But," he told the man, "this is for street car fare. Promise me you are not going to spend it on booze." The man promised, took the dime, and walked away. Dad watched him walk away but immediately became suspicious.

As the man disappeared around the building and headed for the corner street car stop, dad closed the valves to stop the flow of gasoline and went to watch the man. Not surprisingly, the man walked right past the street car stop and entered a bar in the next block.

Dad followed the man into the bar and spotted him perched on a bar stool. The 25¢ lay on the bar in front of him as the bartender proceeded to draw the beer the man had ordered. Dad walked up beside the man and said, "Give me back my dime. You promised you would not spend it on booze." He picked up his dime from the bar, put it in his pocket, turned and left.

I have always wondered what had happened next, when the bartender served the beer - for which the man could not pay.

Why can't they find a man like my father to supervise the spending of the people's money?

My Mom and Macy’s

My mother, and Macy’s Department stores were both born in New York. Mom left shortly after the end of World War One (in 1919, I think) when she married a soldier who carried her off to Kansas City. Some year’s later, when Macy’s decided to expand beyond New York, one of the first cities they chose to open a store was Kansas City.

My parents raised five children. When the youngest was seventeen or eighteen, Mom decided to take a job outside the home. I was living in a different city at that time, so I don’t remember the exact year, why she decided to go to work or why she chose Macy’s. Maybe she needed the money. Maybe Macy’s was advertising "Help Wanted" that week. Maybe it was the New York connection - mother always had a fond recollection of anything connected to New York.

In any event, she went to work as a sales clerk in the men’s furnishings department at Macy’s, Kansas City, in around 1950. She sold stuff like shaving needs, colognes, etc. Like almost everyone who had suffered through the depression, Mom considered a job a valuable asset to be treated as such. She didn’t think of her job as an obligation to show up, put in the hours and receive a pay check. To her the job meant becoming a part of the company, with an obligation to enhance the company’s interests.

Many times I heard my Dad say, "If you work for a man - if he is putting a roof over your head, a shirt on your back and food on your table - for God’s sake work for him!" Mom shared that opinion. In addition, she liked people and thought it perfectly acceptable to intrude on their personal lives if she felt she could benefit them.

If a male customer came to her counter and mentioned that a certain shaving device caused his skin to burn, she would touch his hand and say something like, "Oh, my goodness, you don’t have to suffer that! We have this lotion which will stop that burning and keep your skin soft and supple, too." As a result, her sales figures soared over those of younger sales clerks who worked different shifts in her department.

The manager of that Macy’s store was also from New York, and he frequently stopped my Mom’s counter to reminisce with her about the old days in Brooklyn or Flatbush, or "Green-pernt", as she called Greenpoint.

Eventually Macy’s decided to bring that executive back to New York. Before leaving Kansas City, he stopped by Mom’s department to say goodbye. He told her, if she ever came back to New York, to come see him at Macy’s.

Well, Mom did eventually go back to New York to visit family there. Naturally she insisted on a trip to Macy’s to see her friend. One can only imagine the surprise the secretary experienced when this 50-ish farm type lady from Missouri came into the executive offices and wanted to see "The Man"! She asked Mom the purpose of the visit. Mom said to just tell him that Dorothy Bradley from Kansas City is in town and stopped by to say hello.

Upon receiving this news, the Macy’s executive bolted from his office, gave Mom a big hug, and they sat down for a nice chat about the old days in Kansas City, before she went on her way.

Later, at home, when Mom told the story, she only told us how happy she had been to have seen her old friend. This is not an unusual story. It is the way things were before labor unions turned employer-employee dealings into an adversarial relationship.